What if you could have well-behaved, respectful, considerate children without punishment?
What if you didn’t spank, didn’t yell, didn’t have consequences for behavior?
What if you didn’t count to 3 or didn’t do timeouts?
What if you didn’t take away privileges or ground your child? What if you didn’t swat her hand or bum?
What if you didn’t force your child to scrub the walls as punishment for drawing on them?
What if you didn’t yell at your child?
Can you imagine your child turning out okay without these punitive parenting strategies?
What if I told you that there is a different way to parent that would lead to well-behaved, respectful, considerate children?
What if I told you that the lack of punishment did not necessarily mean that children run amok and disrespect their parents?
Would you believe me?
Maybe you wouldn’t believe me at first.
But maybe, over time, curiosity will lead you back to looking into peaceful parenting approaches.
Maybe, over time, you’ll try some of these tactics.
Maybe you’ll find it difficult at first, like you are spinning your wheels.
Maybe your child won’t know how to react to this new parenting style.
And maybe you will feel like your child is pushing your buttons even more in order to test you.
But one day, when you are about to lose it, maybe you’ll take a deep breath and say a short prayer, offering the moment to God and asking for patience and wisdom, and remind yourself that your child doesn’t want to be naughty.
He doesn’t want you to come undone.
He just wants a little bit of power over his life.
He wants to make some choices about the direction of the day, of his life.
Maybe in seeing his defiance from his perspective of being bossed all day,
being told what to do and when to do it,
you will be able to go up to him and truly empathize with his frustration.
Maybe, just maybe, that true empathy will lead him to let his guard down.
Maybe, in knowing you understand his frustration, he will relax a little and feel a little safer, a little more in control.
To be understood would be a gift to him.
Maybe, just maybe, in seeing him as a person who has purpose and something to offer, you will be able to establish a relationship based on mutual respect and cooperation.
Maybe, over time, you will slowly drop punishment-based behavior correction.
Maybe you won’t even realize you did it.
Maybe one day you will turn to apologize to your child for having yelled, and you will realize that it had been 2 weeks since you have yelled.
Or a month since you had spanked.
Or a week since you used time-outs.
And maybe you’ll notice the peace that is in your home now that you don’t see your child as a contrarian.
Maybe you don’t need to parent with punishment.
Maybe there is a different and more effective way to raise the children you want to raise.
Maybe there is a peaceful way.
May Christ’s Peace be with you.
💕🙏💕